My Random moment

First week of my term 3 holidays.
It was welcomed by the most tiring and fun experience of CYN- so far; our concert.
The morning and afternoon service last Sunday caused me more fun and exhaustion.
And then there's the sleep ins; 11:00 pm breakfasts and dawn bedtimes.
And then there are the holiday "plans". Party, bowling, shopping, movies, sleepovers, jammings.
It has only been 5 days since the last day of school, but somehow I still seem to find a boring moment in my so called hectic-ang-schedule-ko life.
I wonder why?
Is it because I have no credit?
Is it because this busy life has become normal to me now?
Is it because...he's gone?
Random. That's the one. Everytime I seem to talk about something completely different, something that is not related to him, I end up including him in it anyway. Yea okei. We talk, but not like he wants to. It bugs me. It ruins my day. It bores my holiday. It makes me so down. To think that I'm having the time of my life is great. But one little thing, that little thing of knowing that I've lost him becomes a reason for me to feel so incomplete. I didnt ask for more than his friendship...but I guess, he cant spare me a single space in his heart to be his friend-even just a friend.
So do I stay away?
Do I keep hanging on?
Do I wait?
Do I ignore it?
Or should I just go have "fun" with those who care more than he does? Like my friends for example.
Yeah maybe..
But I admit...
life without him will never be the same.

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