I'm asking "why?"

There were moments, I just sat there. I see you, you see me, you smiled, I smiled.
And never did I make a big deal out of it.
There were moments when it seemed like there was just you and me in this world, like we shared this connection...but I just ignored it.
You know why? I asked myself "why?"
And now I'm asnwering the question I asked myself.
"because it's wrong"
At sixteen, I may not be matured as how I should be, or I might not have experienced much to know how things work..BUT I know what is wrong from right. And I do have common sense.
But what I don't undersatnd is even I know this is wrong, why can't I stop myself from having that feeling. Is it beyond my control?
We're here, so close, yet so far away. Out of reach, that's you. But still my heart stubbornly continues to ignore the obvious and pretends its okei. Sometimes I find it funny, stupid. But to think about it, its not funny at all. I am causing myself my own pain, my own grief, my own troubles.
What can I do?
You seem to have filled that empty space in my heart, yet I did not know. Yet I did not care.
Because I knew its wrong.
And now its done...
I'll sit here and pray...


"God will you keep him safe from the thunderstorm, when the day is cold will you keep him warm, when the darkness falls will you please shine him the way...God will you let him know that I love him so, when there's no one there that he's not alone, just close his eyes and let him know my heart is beating with his..." - Devotion

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